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Blakk Frogg Wear? Blakk Frogg advances his sarcasm by digging deep in his beer-soaked brain for cool ideas so that you can tell the world to put a cock in it!
Blakk Frogg heard you scream, "tie me up tight & wear me out" before you had to pick your speed 'cuz you were ready to screw a texas tart at the end of a cheap date... Hopefully ya' did-r-good!
Check out the cool gear
Show your Frogg? Dear Ladies:
Blakk Frogg loves the ladies and thinks you look great in that outfit... BUT he also thinks you would look even BETTER if you showed your Frogg!
Crocodile tears?
The human body can defend itself from all sorts of nasty bacteriological vermin but other stuff it simply cannot handle. Some scientist reasoned that a creature that rips raw meat off living animals in a nasty ass river must have a better immune system than humans.
Americas Best Archives? Use these links if you dare. Blakk Frogg packed all sorts of jokes, pics, sarcasm and, um, other useless crap in these pages over the years... so ENJOY!
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modelling careers for the middle of the road average joe!
News Article Wednesday, August 17th 2005, 10:44am EST Playgirl's hunks? The hairy, chubby & poor! "Forget waxed chests and rock-hard abs. A new survey finds ladies like their men scruffy, a wee bit chubby - and definitely not a metrosexual. Playgirl asked 2,000 of its readers what they find sexy in a man and the answers were surprising: 42% said they thought love handles were kind of sexy and 47% approved of chest hair. The mag, which often features toned, hairless males in its beefcake photo spreads, is now searching for a man who meets readers' standards. Average Joes everywhere can send photos to models@playgirlmag.com to compete for a shot at a pictorial in a future issue. Rich playboys need not apply - only 4% of women said the size of a man's wallet mattered. Metrosexuals are also out: 73% want a guy who is "rough around the edges."" -- from allofem.com news Will Blakk Frogg submit an entry to the folks at Playgirl? Not too likely. No need to have the entire planet losing its damn mind over my fine amphibious ass. Consider my not participating in this contest an act of Community Service.
Got any jokes about Hillary Clinton? I lived in the glorious state of New York and yet I have no feelings about this woman. Weird, right? Maybe I should have tried giving a sh#t. Maybe then I might have feelings about a woman whose husband publicly humiliated her in front of the entire world by getting head from an inexperienced intern that allowed him to (allegedly) put cigars in her trout box.
Can you give us some more politically oriented humor? "We the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid more riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior, and secure the blessings of debt-free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great-grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt ridden, delusional, and other right-wing bed-wetters. We hold these truths to be self evident: that a whole lot of people are confused by the Bill of Rights and are so dim they require a Bill of NON-Rights." ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV, or any other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything. ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone - not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc.; but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be. ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy. ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional couch potatoes. ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health care. ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair. ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob, cheat, or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure. ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful. ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to PURSUE happiness, which by the way, is a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an over abundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights. ARTICLE X: This is an English speaking country. We don't care where you are from, English is our language. Learn it or go back to wherever you came from! (lastly....) ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all; with no fear of persecution. The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage and history, and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!!!! - from email, ya' whiney pricks! |
- thanks for reading Volume 29 -
